Stop Putting So Much Pressure on Yourself!

There’s a lot of pressure associated with being single. You have friends who are married or in relationships, and the media is relentlessly showing you visions of people who have one date after another, with hardly a moment to breathe.

You want to find a nice woman to date, and you’d like to find a nice woman to share your life with, but you’re not so sure about the idea of trying to date seven nights a week, no matter what the dating gurus tell you.

It’s fun to have a busy social life, but let’s be real about this - quantity does not equal quality and dating just because you feel some social pressure to, is dating for the wrong reason.

Let’s take some of the pressure off and take a sane and realistic approach to dating. What do we know?

You need to relax a bit and not be in such a huge hurry. Even if you’ve waited all your life to find Mrs. Right, and you don’t want to miss out, you still have to get your head on straight and take a sane approach to dating, not a frenzied one.

Since you’ll probably need to date several women to find the right girl for you, you should commit yourself to approaching dating in a relaxed manner, knowing that any girl could be her, but any girl might not be, too.

The pressure to be paired-up is heavy for both men and women, and it doesn’t matter if you’re 20 or 70. Well-meaning friends and colleagues, not to mention your family want to know when you’re going to settle down and find a girlfriend or wife.

They must have forgotten that good women don’t just fall out of the sky and into your yard with your name pinned to their blouse. Finding the right mate takes time and effort. Don’t allow yourself to fixate on the number of dates you’ve had in the last week, month or year.

By using a sensible approach to dating and not rushing yourself, you’ll find that you have better results. This isn’t to say that you should simply sit at home waiting for her to show up. You still have to put yourself out there and take risks if you want the rewards.

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Dr. Molly Goodman is founder of the Goodman Institute For Better Sex.
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