Women Like Positive Approaches!

You’ve spotted a nice woman that you’d like to get to know. Your initial approach is going to make all the difference in how she perceives you and whether or not she’s open to getting to know you better.

When you notice a woman you want to talk to, you can start things off before you even say a word to her. An exchanged smile when she looks your way with a second of eye contact is a good way to start things off.

This happens in the span of a couple of seconds, but it’s a great way to start. Once a glance and a smile are exchanged, you can approach her and start a conversation. This can be scary, but it’s the way things work.

Of course, you don’t need to wait to catch her eye first. You can always just walk up to her and start a pleasant conversation. When you approach her to talk, start out on a positive note, and keep things that way.

A smile and an interesting comment or question will work. Hopefully, you’ve prepared yourself with something interesting and relevant to say, and you’ve left the pick-up lines at home. Depending on where you are and what the occasion is, you can come up with interesting openers.

If you’re at your friend’s wedding, then comment about the DJ or the Band, or how happy the bride and groom look. If you’re at a business meeting, ask her which department she’s from. Let the conversation develop from there.

As you’re talking, remember to keep things positive and upbeat. Women don’t want to meet a guy who complains about things or seems negative about himself. Along the same vein, don’t disagree with her about everything.

For example: if she says she thinks that George Michael is the greatest performer of all time, you can tactfully say that you prefer David Bowie. With issues that have a way of getting people irritated, you should tread more lightly.

Saying that her choice of political candidate is just plain wrong should be avoided. You can always smile and say, "Candidate So and So seems to have a strong following. I am still making my decision."

Other sensitive topics include religion, sexual orientation, ecological issues, money and even the holidays. Just steer clear of confrontation and keep things nice while you’re getting to know each other.

If you find that she doesn’t know how to follow the rules of positive conversation, bow out and find someone else to talk to, or she’ll ruin your own good mood. The rules for keeping things upbeat go both ways and you’re looking for someone with a positive outlook, too.

Both women and men want to meet people who are positive and fun to talk to – not depressing, negative or confrontational. Remember to think of some pleasant openers, smile and show interest in what your new acquaintance has to say. By doing this, you’ll make a new friend and you might even find your next date!

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Dr. Molly Goodman is founder of the Goodman Institute For Better Sex.
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